Thoughts on Being Part of a Village

They say, "If you want to have a village, you have to be a villager." But Chesca, I cannot pour from an empty cup. Pagod na ako tutulong pa ako sa iba???

I am still processing the happenings over the weekend. As an introvert mom, being out a lot can be quite overwhelming.

• On Friday, I drove for my mom because she needed to visit someone out of town.
• On Saturday, I went to the Milk Tea Meetup hosted by Bagong Nanay Judy Aladin. And there we met Mamas Ky, Kai, Ces, Camille, and Frances. We talked about motherhood and life using the Milk Tea Confessions mom date cards. I learned that we are all unique in our own motherhood journeys, but we are also the same in our collective joys and griefs as mothers. (If you're hosting a mom meet-up you can use them too - it's free and it's fun lalo na sa introverts like me who don't know how to do small talk!!!)
• On Sunday, I helped decorate and organize a 40th surprise birthday party. Kapagod but it is such a joy to help make another person feel LOVED and CARED for especially on their birthday milestones.

And the happenings over the weekend had me reflecting on what it takes to be a VILLAGER. It will definitely take up a lot of your time, energy and money BUT we need it. Because we were not meant to mother alone. Pero how can we go about it ng hindi tayo nauubos? Two thoughts:

1. Give what you already have. What are you great at? Start with that. To me that looks like decorating for parties, designing invitations and presentations, hosting. What skills do you have that you can share?
2. Say YES only if you can and prepare for it. Assess yourself - kaya ba ito ng aking time, energy and resources? Anong pwede kong gawin to be ready? It can look like finding someone else to take care of your kids, letting go of other commitments or even resting earlier so you can have the energy the next day.
   

Showing up for your village is a form of self-sacrifice but it can also be a fulfilling part of your motherhood journey. It can be tiring to share yourself to others, but it can also fill you up. 

We talk more about self love and self sacrifice in our book Holding Both - it's a book where we talk about the quiet contradictions we carry as mothers.

Have a great week ahead, Mamas!

Love,
Chesca